The Borowitz Report-Trump Urges Vatican to Select New Pope from Cast of "Fox & Friends"

[LetMyPeopleVote]

Trump Urges Vatican to Select New Pope from Cast of "Fox & Friends"
open.substack.com/pub/borowitz...

— (@insightful-world.bsky.social) 2025-04-21T14:34:14.740Z

Link to tweet

https://www.borowitzreport.com/p/trump-urges-vatican-to-select-new

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Arguing that “it’s the smartest way to go,” Donald J. Trump urged the Vatican on Monday to select the next pope from the cast of “Fox & Friends.”

“You want to have a pope who’s good on TV,” Trump said. “The ‘Fox & Friends’ people are the best TV people in the business.”

Trump seemed to disqualify co-host Ainsley Earhardt, commenting, “I don’t know if you can have a girl pope. No knock on Ainsley, but I don’t think people are ready for that.”

Alternatively, he added, "Maybe go with Doocy--he looks like he's never had sex."

[rurallib]

1. great satire hits close to reality. This is damn near a bullseye

[LetMyPeopleVote]

3. trump used Fox to fill his cabinet

[gab13by13]

2. I mean, it's mean, but

it has to be the post of the day.

[dalton99a]

4. Kick

[tanyev]

5. Unfortunately, Doocy's son Peter is walking proof that he's had sex at least once.

[UTUSN]

6. K&R

Last edited Tue Apr 22, 2025, 06:13 PM - Edit history (2)

[Yo_Mama_Been_Loggin]

7. Dumb Fux and Friends