Spurious News: Nobel Prize Committee announces recipient of 2025 Peace Prize!

[jmowreader]

STOCKHOLM, SWEDEN (Spurious News Network) -- The Nobel Peace Prize is the most prestigious of all the Nobel Prizes, having been established by a man ashamed of the use of his greatest invention in war.

Today, the Nobel Committee announced the recipient of the Peace Prize.

"The Nobel Prize Committee is pleased to award the Peace Prize for 2025 to everyone on the face of the planet who isn't Donald Trump."

The tangible rewards of the prize are a gold medal, a diploma and 11 million Swedish Kronor, which comes to over $1 million US dollars. Since it's impossible to divide 11 million kronor among 8 billion people without using expensive scientific instruments to cut up the bills into small enough pieces, the honorarium this year was divided with one million kronor each going to Chef Jose Andres' World Kitchen and climate activist Greta Thunberg, and the rest going to Ukrainian president Volodymyr Zelenskyy, who promised to use the money for humanitarian aid for Ukrainians rather than buying a bomber to deal with the problem once and for all.

[Jack Valentino]

1. I thank the Nobel committee for my small share of this honor!

Small as it is, I certainly deserve it more than the
fascist rapist felon murdering orange NAZI son of a bitch
who covets it much more than I do!

[BidenRocks]

2. Peace?

Let's ask the residents of Chicago, Portland, Los Angeles, Memphis, Washington D.C., etc.

Peace through war or extortion isn't really a peace.

Winners quietly do good deeds and like Jewish giving, is done anonymously, without expectations.

Jimmy Carter comes to mind.

Has any diktator won the prize? To Wiki: No dictators have won the Nobel Peace Prize, but some, including Adolf Hitler, Benito Mussolini, and Joseph Stalin, were nominated for the award. Hitler's nomination was a satirical attempt by a Swedish anti-fascist politician and was withdrawn. Mussolini and Stalin received legitimate nominations for their actions related to World War II and the post-war era, but neither was shortlisted for the prize.

[Buddyzbuddy]

3. Excellent! I can't imagine a more deserving group of recipients.

If I only had 10% of their selflessness, fortitude and foresight, I would die a happy man.
Bravo!