The Sweet Smell Of GOP Failure
Michael Cohen
If schadenfreude had a scent, itd smell a lot like last night. Sweet. Sharp. A mix of singed ego, burnt donor cash, and the unmistakable whiff of panic wafting from Trumps MAGA headquarters. Democrats didnt just win; they annihilated. New York, New Jersey, Virginia, Californiablue waves crashing so hard they washed the red right off the map.
And now, the same GOP megadonors who spent years perfecting the art of gerrymandering are clutching their pearls and preaching about fairness. Suddenly, theyre born-again believers in independent redistricting. Please. Spare me the sanctimony.
Lets call it what it was: a political beatdown. In Virginia, Abigail Spanberger, a former CIA officer and moderate Democrat, handed Winsome Earle-Sears her own career on a platter. In New Jersey, Mikie Sherrill dismantled Jack Ciattarellis Jersey guy act like it was a bad mob impression. In California, voters approved Proposition 50, rewriting the states congressional maps in Democrats favor and turning Republican megadonor Charles Munger Jr.s $30 million good governance crusade into a bonfire of wasted millions.
And then theres Trump. Americas favorite self-declared winner spent the night explaining why everyone else lost. He blamed the government shutdown. He blamed bad candidates. He even blamed his own absence from the ballot, as though democracy itself only functions when hes the headliner. On Truth Social, he actually wrote in all caps that TRUMP WASNT ON THE BALLOT, as if that were the moral of the story rather than the entire problem.
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