"I've had all I can stands, I can't stands no more." -Popeye The Sailor Man

[JohnnyRingo]

I don’t want to connect my coffee machine to the wifi network. I don’t want to share the file with OneDrive. I don’t want to download an app to check my car’s fluid levels. I don’t want to scan a QR code to view the restaurant menu. I don’t want to let Google know my location before showing me the search results. I don’t want to include a Teams link on the calendar invite.

I don’t want to pay 50 different monthly subscription fees for all my software. I don’t want to upgrade to TurboTax platinum plus audit protection. I don’t want to install the Webex plugin to join the meeting. I don’t want to share my car’s braking data with the actuaries at State Farm. I don’t want to text with your AI chatbot. I don’t want to download the Instagram app to look at your picture.

I don’t want to type in my email address to view the content on your company’s website. I don’t want text messages with promo codes. I don’t want to leave your company a five-star Google review in exchange for the chance to win a $20 Starbucks gift card. I don’t want to join your exclusive community in the metaverse. I don’t want AI to help me write my comments on LinkedIn. I don’t even want to be on LinkedIn in the first place.

I just want to pay for a product one time (and only one time), know that it’s going to work flawlessly, press 0 to speak to an operator if I need help, and otherwise be left alone and treated with some small measure of human dignity, if that’s not too much to ask anymore.

[Diamond_Dog]

1. K and R a thousand times.

I’ve actually heard of new ovens that need to connect to your WiFi to operate. It’s gone way too far. I’m sick of it, too.

[OAITW r.2.0]

2. Sounds like a manifesto. One that I completely agree with.

[brush]

3. YES. YES. YES. My feelings exactly.

No more complications, pls.

[RoadRunner]

4. Preach!

Add: don’t ever want want to see or read another influencer.

[LoisB]

5. I could not possibly agree with you more. I also don't want to listen to 15 minutes of your

locations and hours of operation, changes you have made to your telephone prompts, and advice that I can visit your website 24/7.

[ShazzieB]

24. THIS!

[cab67]

39. Most of the time,

the problem I'm having or the question I want to ask isn't included in the recorded flowchart.

[LoisB]

44. I have encountered that too and they do their

darnest to discourage you from actually speaking with a human.

[IbogaProject]

73. If it gets annoying I start cursing but that doesn't always help with robots

[LoisB]

74. LOL. No, it doesn't. I do the same.

[SheltieLover]

76. I regularly cuss out the automated attendants.

[Prairie_Seagull]

94. I have heard that our voices are being recorded even on 'ignore'.

Sheltie, best not to mention anything violent IMO. haha

[SheltieLover]

95. Oh I'm sure!

I never say anything violent. Lots of swear words directed at the pos bots thou. Ty for the advice.

[Prairie_Seagull]

96. If I had a nickle for every time...

I might be able to afford an omelette. Beth's (a greasy spoon in Seattle) is charging 35 bucks for it's famous 12 egg omelette, served on a bed of hash-browns. Went there as a younger version of myself. Just re-opened.

35 samoleons. Hell may be worth it.

https://www.funtrivia.com/askft/Question13812.html

[yellowdogintexas]

86. My mother used to call the auto-voice "That woman who won't let me talk to anyone"

She died in 2004. I can only imagine what she would say about the even more ridiculous phone walls we have to break through

[NH Ethylene]

92. I called my state's medical marijuana 'department' yesterday

And a man answered the phone! Just like that!

I was so startled by this, for a second I didn't even know what to say. He then went on to be very kind and helpful with my questions. Like in the old days.

[UpInArms]

6. I could not have said it better

[SheltieLover]

7. Well said

I absolutely will not put my email addy in box on websites to view content. My feeling is I got along fine before I tried to open the page, so I'll get along fine just closing it & forgetting about it.

I absolutely will not even consider appliances that connect to wifi.

And I have zero desire to drive a fucking sewing machine. I get 50 mpg in my old Honda & drive very little.

Gee, it's almost like private equity is trying to squeeze the last shred of life out of us. (I first fely this way in the early 2000s...)

[ShazzieB]

29. Any website that requires an email address is an automatic "no" for me.

If it has content that I want to see badly enough, I might try putting in a fake one. (It's surprising how often that works, lol.) But mostly I just nope out. I do NOT want any more unwanted email than I already get (which is way, way, way too much as it is), thank you very much.

I also hate those pop-ups so many websites have that ask if you want to subscribe to their newsletter and have to be closed before you can see the content you came for. They are a complete waste of time.

[SheltieLover]

30. It is a constant assault on our senses, imo

Oh great idea! I've never tried putting a bogus email addy! Thx for the idea.

Those pop ups piss me off to no end!

Then there are the automated attendants! how many times do we have to repeat customer service to get a human on the phone? 3-4 for Amazon, 2-3 for Kroger pharmacy.

Imagine a workd where the mondy hoarders weren't cutting jobs everywhere. Fucking private equity...

[aggiesal]

52. [e-mail] is the fake email address I use. Surprisingly, it works like 99% of the time. n/t

[calimary]

56. Oh MAN!!! Your last complaint!!!

I hate that “subscribe if you want to read the whole thing” bullshit! How dare they!?!?!?! It’s another way to con you into coughing up more of YOUR money.

I.

Will NOT.

Play.

That.

Game!!!!!

[TommyT139]

40. Now hold on a minute....

There are sewing machines you can drive?

Very tempting....but do they come with those air-blown self-threader thingies?

[moonshinegnomie]

60. i set up an email address to use for that garbage

i go in once a month or so ad delete every nmessage in it since its nothing but spam. i register with it,click the "verification link" they send and then never bother again

[FoxNewsSucks]

69. I did the same, wish i'd done it earlier

Decades later I still get the crap from those original ones.

And I can't believe how much that junk inbox gets. Who buys anything because they received a stupid email???

[ybbor]

8. Hear, Hear!

Very well said! Couldn’t agree more!

[Uncle Joe]

9. You nailed it with a sledge hammer!

Thanks for the thread JohnnyRingo

[Bo Zarts]

10. 10-4!

[OldSWODog]

11. Amen!

[Paper Roses]

12. Agree 100% Sick of all the baloney! n/t

[Ray Bruns]

13. You will be assimilated and your biological diversity will be added to our own!

You will service us!

[dchill]

14. We have all found ourselves here. I feel included!

[Wild blueberry]

15. Your post speaks for me as well

Thank you!

[DownriverDem]

16. His phone

My husband uses an Iris Flip Phone. He hates that he has to take it everywhere he goes. I made him get it because there are no more pay phones. I use an old Samsung J7 Android phone. My phone is not joined to my hip either. I'm on my Chromebook laptop most of the time.

[AllaN01Bear]

17. enoguth is too much.

[barbtries]

18. i do about 80% of all that.

well done recap of my life.

I don't do surveys, and I tell AI to fuck off - it's so intrusive.

[iluvtennis]

19. KnR! Spot on n/t

[hauckeye]

20. Had to connect my fridge to wifi -

It was handy one time. I was out of town and got an alert on my phone that the door was open. Called my husband at home, he didn’t realize . He might have gone to bed and left it open all night. Mostly though it’s just annoying.

[Solly Mack]

21. ...

[sop]

22. "Luddites Unite!"

[KPN]

23. Hear, hear!

[peacebuzzard]

25. I had to scan a qr code to validate a warranty on my new W & D and also sign on to the wifi to use the w&d

to hell with that.
I didn't do it.
so now I have to manually press a button, and watch a little illuminated bar go its range inorder to start ithe wash cycle ...or the dryer...
takes at least 30 seconds to start a W & D. sometimes I have to start it over and over especially if I decide I want to add extra rinse or pet pro or change something or maybe it didn't recognize my touch

Where are the buttons or knobs that were instant?

I thought I would finally after years of the laundromat buy the best w & d I could.
I think I made a mistake.

[mnhtnbb]

37. I scanned a QR code to watch a movie

and immediately got porn on my phone and a text from my credit card asking if I'd authorized a charge that was more than the posted cost of the movie (Anora). Had to cancel the credit card, which was also the one with all my auto charging. So I had to notify all those creditors of the new credit card number.
I will NEVER scan a QR code to purchase anything ever again.

[peacebuzzard]

67. Those qr codes are frustrating

enough to make you crazy if you aren't already

[Evolve Dammit]

26. That really resonates. I'm going to chug a can of spinach and read The Book of Luddite. I can be reached by smoke signal

[mwmisses4289]

51. Lol a million times!

My brother jokes that smoke signals are the most reliable form of communication.

[Evolve Dammit]

77. It worked for centuries. My wife says I need a horse, stone tablet and chisel. Not disagreeing. The tech overload is

really having major psychological issues. We were not meant (brain-wise) to keep up with this ever-expanding/ increasing useless (to us) information overload. We have not evolved to process all this shit.
Signed,
Hunter/ gatherer/ provider.

[crud]

27. Digital coupons at the grocery store

If you want the discount you have to clip the coupon in the ap. If I find myself at the store without going on their website and clipping first, I've been hung up in the magazine section waiting for the ap to update (seems it needs updating every other day). Then once it updates (and I remember my password) I have to go from coupon to coupon and clicking the little Clip button on each item. It's ridiculous.

[SheltieLover]

31. And Kroger's digital coupons that even staff can't tell customers how to find

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

57. Giant supermarkets have a decent app & I far prefer digital

click-clipping to using actual. Scissors & keeping track of little pieces of paper. Though, I'd prefer they just give us the sale price without clipping or clicking!

And I totally agree with the main gist of thevOP.

I really despise the popular belief that anything newer is best!

[TommieMommy]

28. Yes yes yes 👍 I totally agree with you.

[ShazzieB]

32. I agree with most of these (although I have not encountered them all).

But I will make an exception for letiting Google know my location before showing me search results, in some cases. That feature can be a lifesaver when you're in an unfamiliar location and need to find a place to eat or some other specific type of business ("I have a headache and need some Tylenol - where's the nearest Walgreens/CVS/Walmart?" Etc.) As long as it's optional and I can tell Google to eff off when I want to, I'm fine with it. But I always look for the option to tell Google it can see my location THIS time, not every time, so that I'm always in charge of whether it sees my location or not.

[aggiesal]

53. My medical insurance company told me to download their app. ...

When I did, it asked to turn on the GPS. I declined. It wouldn't work without the GPS enabled.
When my primary doctor asked why I didn't register through the app, I told him,
removed the GPS requirement and I'll use it.
Until then I'll just use the website.

[Tadpole Raisin]

79. I don't know if this just me or something I did on my iphone

with individual apps (I.e., turning off precise location). When I search for something I decline them knowing my precise location because they already have my general location and the information I receive will be the same.

On map apps when driving, yah I allow it but otherwise no. I’ve turned a lot of intrusive stuff off on my phone except where is my iPhone.

[peacebuzzard]

89. best recent thing I did was to buy a new iPad

so I can use the where's my feature to find my iPhone when I can't find it in my house or yard

[angrychair]

33. I've been in IT for over 30 years

I find that I am a fucking luddite in comparison to most of my coworkers.
I absolutely think that AI is complete bullshit.
I absolutely HATE all the little fees for every damn media apps like Netflix or Paramount+. Everything.
Micro-charging every little thing with each service taking a little bite out of your bank account.

Fuck these people.

Eat. The. Rich.

[mnhtnbb]

34. Pleased to be the 100th rec!

[the nelm]

35. 1000% spot on!! Can I add another one?

No more damned surveys. Why I bought a product or where is none of your business. And if I have a problem with the product or service, believe me, I'll let you know. The constant asking from everyone and everywhere for the damned things has gotten completely out of hand.

[Doodles]

36. Oh, yes!

So sick of these intrusions and drive you nuts with apps, etc. etc. We were just grousing about this whole deal this morning when trying to do i Visa. Grrrr. Still can’t get it!

[birdographer]

38. LOVE this post

If I uncheck the box that offers to send me promotional material and ads, that means I DON’T WANT THAT. They then send me email every day, forcing me to add them to a block list so that those emails go directly to the trash (I have so many blocked emails, the list is endless). Why do they bother putting that option up?

I don’t want to give you my cell phone number so you can text me ads every day. Email is fine for that (so I can block you).

When I need customer service over the phone, I would love to be able to understand the person on the other end—it seems they aren’t even attempting to speak understandable English. “What?” and “Can you say that again, slowly?” and “I’m sorry, I didn’t understand that” through the whole conversation. I often just hang up in frustration.

BTW, Protonmail is a free email website. I almost never use it, but they keep my account open. Once in a while those places ask for your email address and then send you a code to that address. Once in a rare while I want that code, so having an accessible junk mail address is handy. To keep the emails there under 100, I periodically go in and unsubscribe from spam that comes daily.

[Wednesdays]

46. "I would love to be able to understand the person on the other end..."

A few days ago, I made the mistake of trying to contact a company, and the outsourced receptionist mumbled some gibberish. I said, "I'm sorry, I didn't understand that." So the receptionist SHOUTED the same gibberish into my ear!

[JohnnyRingo]

63. ...and they always have an Americanized name.

"Hello, my name is Courtney, how are you today?"..... In a strong Indian accent. As if.

[kiri]

84. sex!

I tell them: We follow in the path of Kama Sutra. Did you have sex on your birthday? It's a great tradition. Did you have sex today?

Scammers are prudes. They hang up.

[Wicked Blue]

41. YES YES YES!

Just yesterday now my fucking credit union began denying me access to online accounts but won't explain why.
I suspect it's some new system that wants me to use Edge instead of Firefox as a browser, and to use their phone app instead of my laptop. Hell no.
After being a member of this credit union since 2001!

[Dorothy V]

42. Enough is enough and enough is too damned much!

I think their ultimate goal is to drive us so crazy that parting us from our money will be all the easier!
All this stuff that is supposed to enrich our lives and make things easier, Don't!
It's enough to make grown people cry!

[highplainsdem]

43. It's a great rant, posted in OPs twice back in February. But it's from a RWer who adores Trump and Musk.

https://www.democraticunderground.com/100220017979

[JohnnyRingo]

64. I don't know who the author is.

It was sent to me by a friend in an IM.
As a Boomer it strikes my right at home. I believe we're the key demo for this, regardless politics.

[Borogove]

45. Glad to see that I'm not the only one who's had enough.

[Initech]

47. I'm sick of all the damn spam I get every day.

No, I don't want to rate or review your product. No, I don't want to take a million surveys. No, I don't want your stupid credit card offers or to be a part of your special club.

How about this - I give you the money, you give me the item. End of transaction, OK?

[Jughead]

48. Right on

Amen!

[aggiesal]

49. No, I don't want to download your store app to get 10% off digital coupon, on your product ...

Last edited Thu Apr 10, 2025, 02:40 PM - Edit history (2)

I feel your pain.

Why do you think all cell phones lock the battery in place?
We used to be able to remove the battery or even buy and replace when needed.
Almost every phone maker now have a non-removable battery. Why?
Here is my theory. When you turn your phone off, the GPS is still powered so
that law enforcement can track the phone at all times.

We now leave digital bread crumbs everywhere we go.
Pay with a debit card, digital.
Membership card to enter stores, digital.
My car has a monitoring system that keeps track of everything the car is doing, all digital.
I air up my car tires, I get an email from the tire store asking for a satisfaction survey.
We have an RFID built into our Drivers License, why? To keep track of us.

You can't get on a commercial aircraft without having an RFID to get past TSA, why? To keep track of us.
The House just past the reconciliation bill that requires that we prove we're citizens when we vote or we risk being removed from the voter rolls. Imaging how many women will lose their right to vote because they birth certificate doesn't match her marriage certificate?
How many black people will lose their right to vote because they don't have a passport or the money to get a passport?
Or the older generation not even having a birth certificate?

If I donate to a candidate, I have to fill in my email, phone number ...
They then sell it to all the other party candidates.
I start getting text messages from just about every party candidate on a daily basis.
And when I text back Stop, Stop2End, ... to Opt Out, I get a reply showing that I Opted out, but it comes from a different phone number.
When I Opt out on that phone number, it goes into a loop where I have to Opt out on 50 phone numbers to make sure that I don't hear from that candidate ever again.

[moonshinegnomie]

59. thats why i wont donate to candidates any more

[aggiesal]

61. I don't donate to large organizations any more, because I don't know where the money is going ...

The priorities for these large organizations are not the same as my priorities, so that's why I donate directly to the candidate of my choice.
But these 50 phone numbers, actually it's 49 phone numbers, is a bother because, if you don't opt out on all 49 phone numbers, within 2 - 3 days I'll get another text from the same candidate on one of the other 48 remaining phone numbers.
I think "Didn't I just Opt out of that candidates donation request?"
Now Opting out on all 49, the messages are coming in, on a crawl.

[love_katz]

50. It is the freaking advertisers.

They think they have the right to constantly shove their $hit in our faces.
It's not like I'm incapable of searching for information about a product on my own. I don't need nor want the constant pressure to Buy, Buy, BUY!

I tend to immediately leave websites that have too many ads and pop -ups. It's not worth my time to mess with it.
I have hated the bulldozer forward march of corporate greed, going back to the 1980's, when corporate buy outs, downsizing, and their insatiable appetite to increase their bottom line while screwing both their employees and the customer began.
A big FU to Ronnie Raygun and his corporate raiders and influencers!

[LudwigPastorius]

54. The Unabomber is a reprehensible mass murderer, so very wrong about many things, but...

he wasn't wrong about the worship of technology bringing about a sociopolitical order that subjugates human needs beneath its own.

This system destroys nature and suppresses individual freedom. In short, humans adapt to machines rather than vice versa, resulting in a society hostile to human potential, freedom, and dignity.

[Marvin Jones]

55. Thanks

Hear! Hear!

[moonshinegnomie]

58. i dealt with this just a few days ago

my siriys satellite radio plan was expiring. i had it for $70 a year and have to call yearly to renew it or else they hike it to 24 or so a onth.
I called. they started to give me shit about having a different name on the account (my wifes) instead of mine. wanted me to verify who i was several times before even getting to a discussion of rate plans. so instead i just told them to cancel it. id had it for 20 years but no more.
i will no longer deal with customer service nonsense. if its a pita to deal with your CS then i dont want to do business with you anymore..

[NCgayguy]

62. I feel your pain

I hate all this computerized stuff. It's just getting too complicated for me. My husband handled everything having to do with computers, tv, laptop, Ipad, smart watches, wifi, car etc... I know nothing about anything except cooking cleaning and caregiving. I'm lost since he past in Jan. Honestly. When one of these things breaks down, I AM SCREWED! It's just a matter of time. Things are getting so complicated. I admit somethings are quite useful but it just seems over the top for someone like me who lacks knowledge. Just this weekend I did our taxes using Turbo tax and it was the first time in 41 years since I did our taxes. It took me over 10 hours and then it was rejected twice before it finally was accepted by the IRS and state. He has our tv hooked up with his Ipad and Laptop and I have no idea how to turn it on or off. I guess I will never watch tv again, not that I care to but that's a different rant.

Sorry Johnny, I saw your post and after having a bad day, I just had to vent. Just ignore me, but know I feel your pain!

[peacebuzzard]

66. welcome to DU NCgayguy

so sorry about your hubbie. come and vent anytime please....

[mnhtnbb]

72. Hi NCgayguy

I'm sorry you lost your husband. And that now everything is on your shoulders. I don't know what I'd do without my techie son to help me, and I was the one in my 32 year marriage who was more tech comfortable.

I see you live in Matthews. I'm in Durham. Have you thought about making an appointment for the Geek Squad to come arrange your TV hookup for you for streaming? Or at least to watch movies? You can make an appointment online here: https://www.bestbuy.com/services/triage/home

They'll come out and troubleshoot for you, not just install new equipment.

Hang in there and come rant anytime. There's always somebody here.

[eppur_se_muova]

65. I always try to use a fake email address if it will work.

Some Web pages only check the form of the address, but don't actually verify it. So a properly constructed account name can get you in, even if you don't have that account. Especially worth trying with newspapers, apparently.

Of course, it may be that there really is a Jethro Walrustitty out there, and if so, I doubt that he knows how many corps have his address. Maybe one of the Pythons set that up (it's from a Monty Python skit).

If that doesn't work, I find another Web page with a similar service. The Internet is a big place, full of both wonders and monsters.

[Number9Dream]

68. I don't need $500 worth of tire pressure sensors to tell me I need air...

... my $4 pressure guage has worked fine for the last 50 years.

[soldierant]

70. For a second I thought you were singing my song

then I realized I'm just part of the chorus. And a great chorus we are.

[Hassler]

71. I'm with you. I'm dreading buying a new car

All I need is AC, radio and cruise control. The rest is sht designed to empty my wallet.

[MrChuck]

75. 100%

I couldn't agree more.

[SheltieLover]

78. Kicking again

[Dave Id]

80. "I've had all..."

I quored that Popeye line when I quit my last job and retired. (fact)

[CTyankee]

81. Any kind of cellphone. I've had 3. I'm old and retired. Leave me alone.

[MuseRider]

82. Oh JohnnyRingo

That was good. My people, you made my husband laugh his ass off as I read it. He, and one of my sons who no longer lives here but visits and gives me all kinds of grief over my short fuse and just walks away now.

Right now I am trying to figure out my new little computer but I cannot get the letters big enough. At least I have learned that smashing it on the table will not help (lol a joke but almost not a joke). The point is that some of us can't read all the convoluted instructions and follow them they are too small.

Thanks for this. It was fun once wasn't it?

[keepthemhonestO]

83. Totally agree

However as an American citizen, we are "for sale" as consumers and Congress could actually protect us and they don't.

When we build our new government after this is over, we need laws that protect us from predatory businesses. IMHO

[Hekate]

85. AMEN!

[pansypoo53219]

87. embrace your luddite ways. hell. i have a vintage stove top coffee pot. makes good drip coffee.

i prefer my old fans + heaters. estate sales rock.

[Bumbles]

88. Thank you, JohnnyRingo. I used some of your thoughts to write a "flash fiction" piece.

The prompt was "lights out." We had to tell our stories with 1,000 words or less. Auntie Bea agreed with Popeye. Below is a link to "Alexa Will Handle It," if you are interested in reading it.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1RYP5j1TkyQaMUXC98QU6FOh5Hwn55SsC/edit

[erronis]

98. Hey, bumbles. You need to give general read access to this document

if you want people to be able to access it.

Click on the "Share" button (in Google Docs). Under "General Access", change "Restricted" to "Anyone with the link".

[Bumbles]

100. Thank you, erronis. I'm still a newby. I hope this works.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1RYP5j1TkyQaMUXC98QU6FOh5Hwn55SsC/edit?usp=sharing&ouid=102916628292729077788&rtpof=true&sd=true

[erronis]

101. Looks good. Love your writing!

[Bumbles]

102. Thank you, erronis. I love writing.

[mountain grammy]

90. I feel the frustration.. it's maddening

the world is for tech and the young. It's their thing, it sure isn't mine.

Luckily at 77 I can't and won't be bothered.

[NH Ethylene]

91. I can't 'rec' this post enough.

To add on: I sure as hell don't want 'Siri' in my home monitoring my every word!

[RainCaster]

93. postimage free image hosting

It looks like your picture has been replaced with Spam for the hosting site.

[JohnnyRingo]

97. I've never heard of that happening

The image of the woman attacking her computer with a hammer still shows on my screen.

[RandomNumbers]

99. I took that as deliciously ironic.