Tomorrow's therapy appointment is very well timed

[Siwsan]

I went to my nephew's house for a PreEaster lunch. (I made up that word) I was looking forward to seeing the kids, and their dad from whom I was estranged for about 6 years. He was in a relationship with an extraordinarily toxic female. She was his girlfriend before he met my sister. They started seeing each other, again, very shortly after my sister's death. Side note, these two women couldn't be more different. I mean WORLDS apart. Also, my sister knew her and her family but definitely did not care for them.

I finally saw him right around Labor Day. The last time I had spoken with him was about 3 years ago, at Christmas time, when he told me he wouldn't come to the traditional family Christmas Eve dinner if she wasn't invited. NOBODY, including his kids, can stand this woman and it would have spoiled everyone's night. We'd all given her a chance and she did nothing but do everything she could to alienate him from us. He let me know that SHE was the important one. Not me. Okey Dokey.

Long story short, he finally broke up with her last Summer. We'd all been getting along just fine and things were back to normal. The kids were so happy and it was like having my good friend back. He and I had always been close, until this female told me, at my niece's wedding, that God took my sister so that I could be there with her children. No kidding. I was already emotional, missing my sister's presence at this celebration. I'm not sure how I controlled my urge to punch her square in her smug face. I avoided her for the rest of the night. My niece and nephews sat with me at the reception.

Now to the point. I found out, yesterday, that they are back together. I learned this just before we sat down to eat. I got a couple of bits of lunch down and promptly fled the room to throw up. The break up was about the only positive development, over the past 6 years.

I've had a long streak of tear free sessions but that might come to an end, tomorrow.

[LiberalLoner]

1. Ugh. How awful. I'm sorry. I hope things work out better than they are now. Hugs. 💙💙💙💙

[Siwsan]

2. Thanks

He's just a completely different person when he's with her. At one point his daughter washed her hands of him.

The last promise I made to my sister was that I would always be there for her kids and husband. He and all of the kid's spouses came from VERY dysfunctional families so I've tried SO HARD to be the best and most supportive sister/aunt-in-law possible.

I know, for sure, that as soon as I get home from the appointment, I'll fall asleep.

[LiberalLoner]

3. They are lucky to have you in their lives. I hope things will work out soon. Usually people do break up

With toxic people. Might take more than one attempt though, like smoking.

My third stepmother left my abusive father, then after a few months remarried him and he was worse than ever, his stepdaughters kept calling the cops when he would beat their mother and finally he was arrested…a year or so after that she finally left him for good and started the long slow process of recovering and regaining the sanity he took from her. My stepsisters recovered from the nightmare but to this day hate him with a passion. He would do things like superglue the family Yorkshire terrier’s lips together as “punishment” and when he came back to find the kids had adopted a kitten, he took the kitten and threw it as hard as he could over the fence. The kitten never returned. Animals are smarter than humans, they know to never return to danger.