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AverageOldGuy

(3,949 posts)
22. Speaking as an EMT
Sat Mar 28, 2026, 10:59 AM
Mar 28

I'm an old EMT, still licensed, but at 81 no longer running rescue -- help keeping records and supplies, training, keep the ambulances stocked and clean.

The second emergency call I ran years ago was this. I lived in rural Virginia, ran rescue there for 15 years. Because our station was not staffed, when we were dispatched, we had to go to the station, get the ambulance, collect a crew, and get to the scene. As a result, all us EMT's and Paramedics carried well-stocked bags in our vehicles and, if the scene was close to where we were when dispatched, we could go directly to the scene and do what we could before the ambulance and crew arrived.

About a mile from my home was a group of waterfront (Chesapeake Bay) weekend and vacation homes. A bunch of 5-8 guys would come down from DC on the weekends to one house, drink beer, play poker, watch NFL on Sunday.

One of them went on a beer run, came back in carrying a couple of cases. Entrance foyer had granite flagstones that were damp -- it was raining, they were tracking in moisture.

He slipped on the granite, fell forward, smacked his forehead, defecated and urinated all over himself, and went unconscious. The other guys called 911, I was on the scene about 6 minutes after their call. When I arrived he was already into decorticate posturing -- stiff, bent arms held against the chest, clenched fists, and rigid, extended legs -- sure sign of severe bleeding in the brain, death only minutes away. The fact of urination and defecation were sure signs he was all but dead -- sphincter muscles involuntarily relaxed. I could hear his agonal breathing before I even opened the door. He gave two gasps and was gone.

And that, folks, is what will happen on the White House colonnade. Let's hope it happens to you-know-who on the first day because you know he will insist on being the first to prance down the walkway.

Recommendations

18 members have recommended this reply (displayed in chronological order):

Black granite? Ugly and slippery. Ritabert Mar 28 #1
Let's hope he shuffles down his new walkway on a rainy day Blaukraut Mar 28 #7
Speaking as an EMT AverageOldGuy Mar 28 #22
Wow. He wants shiny black granite to reflect the gold stuff he's put up on the walls Ritabert Mar 28 #27
Reflects his hard shiny black heart of stone. calimary Mar 28 #48
Ha ha! Good one. Ritabert Mar 28 #57
He will Rebl2 Mar 28 #33
And those Florsheim shoes will be no help. He'll need serious tread on the soles. Ritabert Mar 28 #34
I thought Rebl2 Mar 28 #35
And it couldn't happen to a nicer bunch. Ritabert Mar 28 #58
And women wearing high heels. Sequoia Mar 28 #65
And there better be news cameras Blaukraut Mar 28 #45
Maybe he can have whiskey Pete escort him and hope for the best newdeal2 Mar 28 #18
Those mile high stilettos she wears might be a problem Deuxcents Mar 28 #42
One photo op. calimary Mar 28 #52
My first Rebl2 Mar 28 #26
He wants shiny black to reflect all the gold stuff he's put up on the walls of the colonnade. I kid you not. Ritabert Mar 28 #29
Good. I hope he falls and breaks his neck. paleotn Mar 28 #40
At least then we won't have to hear him speak in a neck brace Deuxcents Mar 28 #41
Someone should show him the picture of Obama running with the kids... llmart Mar 28 #60
"Good. I hope he falls and breaks his neck." Talitha Mar 28 #63
Presidential Walk of Fame? C_U_L8R Mar 28 #2
How much you wanna bet?? AZ8theist Mar 28 #20
I think it is the one where he put up pix of past presidents usedtobedemgurl Mar 28 #46
Whoa! calimary Mar 28 #56
He hates Biden because he LOST an election to him. Nothing more. AZ8theist Mar 28 #64
Last no kings he tore down the east wing, how will he commemorate this one? Blues Heron Mar 28 #3
Iran. durablend Mar 28 #9
Cuba invasion. Ritabert Mar 28 #30
They used flagstone for a reason..... Historic NY Mar 28 #4
Maybe he's sealing his own fate, wouldn't that be ironic Blues Heron Mar 28 #12
He destroyed these too. Botany Mar 28 #16
Those leather for Florseims he makes them wear can be pretty slippery Walleye Mar 28 #25
Granite is very slippery when wet. Ritabert Mar 28 #32
If the protest goes over 10 million will he doze the entire White House? CrispyQ Mar 28 #5
Maybe he'll slip bamagal62 Mar 28 #6
I am so sick and tired UpInArms Mar 28 #8
Holy shit! Who will stop this human wrecking ball? FalloutShelter Mar 28 #10
We are the US taxpayers and we OWN the White House, not Chump FakeNoose Mar 28 #23
The next president should demo everything Johonny Mar 28 #11
Make TSF pay for the damages Deuxcents Mar 28 #44
Trump never pays for anything Johonny Mar 28 #53
Slippery when wet AverageOldGuy Mar 28 #13
My Aunt bought a house with a black granite bathroom countertop. Zackzzzz Mar 28 #14
He has made me hate the word "beautiful." fierywoman Mar 28 #15
it'll crack its skull, hopefully dave99 Mar 28 #17
And will the name Trump be incised in every tile? Lonestarblue Mar 28 #19
motherfucker oldinmtdem92 Mar 28 #21
He believes he owns the whole country, including every penny in the treasury Walleye Mar 28 #28
Reminds me of the last time I lived in a rental. Hope22 Mar 28 #49
His behavior suggests he thinks he's a king. calimary Mar 28 #50
He has a bottomless hole in his soul that will never be filled by his ego trips Walleye Mar 28 #62
😥 😢 😭 Silver Gaia Mar 28 #24
I wish this creep would stop destroying the People's House and our country Niagara Mar 28 #31
Get him the #ell out of there! Hope22 Mar 28 #36
trump is destroying the White House LetMyPeopleVote Mar 28 #37
;-{)....ballroom Goonch Mar 28 #38
It will end up looking like mar-a-lardo. spanone Mar 28 #39
Did he get approval or just like he destroyed the East Wing on his own? Norrrm Mar 28 #43
"Redesign" is quite a word for what he's actually doing ananda Mar 28 #47
Dems need to promise to scour Trump's presence from America... EllisWhy Mar 28 #51
The pedophile prez says he will pay for it. pandr32 Mar 28 #54
One week and Cesar Chavez is almost gone. BidenRocks Mar 28 #55
He has not intention of ever leaving. Remember that. n/t flvegan Mar 28 #59
Trump is like a broken down old dog, pissing all over everything to claim it as his "territory". LudwigPastorius Mar 28 #61
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