Help! Trying to keep my family from falling apart!!

[Newest Reality]

3. She...

She seems to have negated her statement with a nyah, nyah, you can't make me.

It does take time for them to pull their heads out of their rears and that may come with time. For now, any behaviors and acting out are being exacerbated by the conditions that everyone in your family is enduring in some way or another.

Try to remember that a family is a dynamic system, like one of those floating mobiles. Avoid making her the focus of the family gestalt. It takes all of you to tango and sometimes one member will act out the issues in the dynamic. So, so maybe don't point the finger at her and make it "her" problem. Let's fix her is not a good approach at all.

If she doesn't want to attend any kind of therapy, that is her choice. However, you or other members could go in for some counseling to see what's going on there. If you get a good counselor who does family therapy, then there may be tips and insights you can garner to adjust the FAMILY, not just her. She may then respond differently due to that.

Rest assured, it will pass and you might want to pull back a little and remember that you can only control your own states, reactions, responses and behaviors. This is a good time to evaluate your own skin the family game and assess your part in it.