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Mental Health Support

Ocelot II

(126,319 posts)

19. As a performer, you brought pleasure and enjoyment to your audiences.

Reply to OldBaldy1701E (Reply #13)

Mon Jun 30, 2025, 10:58 AM

Jun 30

That is not failure. The music business is like professional sports; only a very few become "successful" in the sense of achieving fame and fortune, and a lot of that success comes from luck and connections as well as talent - many very talented people don't become successful in that way. I know a lot of first-rate musicians, most of whom will never become famous or earn much money, but they perform anyhow and their performances are enjoyed and appreciated. If you can't perform any more that's sad but not unusual - I've known pianists who couldn't play any more because of injuries, singers whose voices wore out, and it's really tough on them - but knowing that when you did perform you brought enjoyment has to be worth something. You didn't fail because you brought people music, one of the most valuable gifts in the universe.

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Highlight:

To my husband. [View all] OldBaldy1701E Jun 29 OP

*Nobody* is a failure, except maybe for Trump. Ocelot II Jun 29 #1

But, when stuff happens disproportionately... OldBaldy1701E Jun 30 #10

If there is a failure it's that of our society, not you, Ocelot II Jun 30 #18

I will not disagree with you on any of that. OldBaldy1701E Jun 30 #22

Whoever "they" are, screw 'em. Only bad, stupid people blame victims. Ocelot II Jun 30 #23

Then, there are WAY more bad, stupid people in the world than one might think. OldBaldy1701E Jul 1 #24

Dear Heart WhiteTara Jun 29 #2

We did not make such vows, but we pretty much said it in our exchanges. OldBaldy1701E Jun 30 #11

Sounds like a conversation is in order. WhiteTara Jun 30 #16

You are valued. Nanuke Jun 29 #3

I doubt I am giving him any joy or comfort. OldBaldy1701E Jun 30 #12

you are giving him purple_haze Jul 1 #28

You are NOT a failure. You are a beautiful, loving, unselfish person. It is not your responsibilty LoisB Jun 29 #4

Well, we are a gay couple. OldBaldy1701E Jun 30 #13

As a performer, you brought pleasure and enjoyment to your audiences. Ocelot II Jun 30 #19

Gay couple, straight couple - no difference to me. A couple is a couple. I hope something LoisB Jun 30 #20

I figured that, but when you said "..it doesn't apply just to the woman.", I felt I should respond. (n/t) OldBaldy1701E Jul 1 #25

I apologize. I should have said "does not apply to only one spouse". I really just want you to LoisB Jul 1 #30

First, I hope that your husband didn't give you the impression that he felt that way about you. 1WorldHope Jun 29 #5

He did not. OldBaldy1701E Jun 30 #14

Oh, no. murielm99 Jun 29 #6

Thanks. The people here seem to be the only ones who think so. (n/t) OldBaldy1701E Jun 30 #17

I don't think your husband is a nice person for making you feel like this. Duppers Jun 29 #7

He is not to blame for any of this. OldBaldy1701E Jun 30 #9

I'm sorry life has treated you like it has. crosinski Jun 29 #8

Thank you. (n/t) OldBaldy1701E Jun 30 #15

Oh man mdmc Jun 30 #21

I don't know how old you are or where you are but Tadpole Raisin Jul 1 #26

Thank you for your suggestions. OldBaldy1701E Jul 1 #27

Once to are over 60 for snap the numbers may change. Tadpole Raisin Jul 1 #29

There is only life. And it can throw awful stuff at you. applegrove Jul 1 #31