My friend's service is Monday - I will see friends who haven't seen me since I gained the weight.

[Dorian Gray]

13. I've had the gain

and the loss. It's difficult and messes with your mind. But know who you are as a person, and be confident. Most people will be focused on the tragic loss of Suzanne's life (and not on your weight gain). (BTW: I am so sorry that you lost your friend in this tragic accident. It's been in the news a lot here, and it's horrific. She was from my neighborhood in BK, so the local news has had lots of info on her.)

This is just one moment in your journey as self acceptance. YOU are not defined by your weight. YOU are defined by what's inside of you. I know saying that isn't going to help you right now, as it takes a long time to learn that.

For me, the weight gain was easier to accept than the weight loss. The gain was gradual over years, so those who saw me didn't notice that much. The loss was also gradual over 3 years, but the reaction that I got to that was vastly different. People don't comment on the gain. People do comment on the loss.

Counseling with someone who specializes in healthy body images might be something to look into. You are human and you are the same person that you were 100 lbs ago. Believe that. Embrace yourself. Love yourself.