Umpire banned from officiating church cricket match because religious ancestor could make him biased

[Fortinbras Armstrong]

3. BTW, let me tell you about my bigamous ancestor

In the 1850s, my four-greats grandfather was captain of a merchant ship running a regular route between England and India. He had a wife and two children at each end of the route.

While he was in England, he had a riding accident and broke his pelvis. So, when the ship arrived in India, the Indian wife asked where her husband was. Upon hearing of his condition, she packed up her children and took the ship back to England. Naturally, as soon as she arrived at his house, the two wives discovered each other.

Somehow, he managed to avoid prosecution for bigamy, but the English wife (who was the legal one) divorced him and took him for everything he had. The two women then proceeded to raise their four children together.