Scapegoated for reporting

[jfz9580m]

76. I am done with groveling to awful people

Last edited Sun May 17, 2026, 01:45 PM - Edit history (2)

And I can’t handle too many people - especially ones I dislike. India is overpopulated so one learns to coexist with people who are truly innocuous which is most except a subset of abrasive, obnoxious types plus the creeps and so on.
Then there are the empty, bitter, sad, lonely self righteous American assholes. I have no use for either.
I liked my mentor because he respected me as a scientist however wanting my social skills are around catty, stupid people I dislike like this loathesome adjacent lab.

I liked the Indian student in his lab and didn’t mind a couple of others like the student he wanted me to work with. I had a suspicion he was a Biblebanger-blat to spell. But this complicated social equation of people who are competent at science and honest and not sexual harassers/racist/sexist or sleazy just obnoxious and loathsome-but whose politics are better but whom you still dislike regardless, conservatives who are nice with atrocious politics..you know I think I will just go with people I actually like and trust on both heads.
And where it is serious and I was affected I am not forgiving it. I am filing complaints but carefully. Their asses are covered and thats good. I don’t want any part of this shitshow

I liked my mentor (minus the rest). I don’t go around sucking up to men or anyone. I just don’t have this giant ass ego that likes to make it political over accept that maybe people dislike me for who I am.

They should. The feeling is more than mutual. Real stuff where I back my mentor aside, socially I already have one male scientist I thoroughly dislike I have to be considerate of because I assessed him as acceptable unfortunately. I am wary of conflicts of interest in ill managed worthless shitholes and I prefer to go back to spaces with less dislikable people.

But the reality is that I don’t know how white or majority group males think. And if they are lording it over me by peeking at unacceptable things I will always file sexual harassment allegations. I am strict that way over going along with tech bros on alarming things and then attacking angry women who use words that refer to reproductive organs. The girl in EasyA did it! Your social norms are full of shit much like you.


I am not anyone’s bloody cat or puppet. I get into elevators with men and so on because I don’t think about it.

But I am not such a sleazy ambitious climbing senseless asshole with shit politics that..if you are non white or female..especially female how do you fail to get how damn degrading that is for other women?
And then you want to put on airs?
So you basically seriously suck up to those man.
I am only civil. It costs me nothing and it doesn’t mean a goddamn thing and if you step out of line the teeniest iota I am filing complaints. I am not normalizing this.

But complaints cannot be filed either as fake Good men nor like entitled egotistical jerks who do serious damage to the left.
I don’t like damaging the impression people have deeper in about feminists, the left etc.

To suck up to those men materially or do photoop stunts and then be huffy is unconvincing.
In the long run women’s rights matter the real way.

I can weather “No exit” because I am not a sleazy hypocritical Stanford or MIT asshole. Spare me the pearl clutching. There is zero forgiveness, i will be fair and accurate.

Fuck off

These are decisions

Most seriously you really don’t see yourselves as other people do. I do. How could i not? The constant spite, dismissiveness because of careening crises you cause alone
If i can’t break even one way, I will another.
Don’t ever again take liberties with me and then bs

And i am filing allegations, i support my mentor/a few students from his lab, the pd counselor of course and that jerk I dislike very much. The asshole who called me pathetic. He is a pathetic douche who wants to impress a collection of repulsive twats at shitholes

I am sick of obnoxious people trying to hijack sociopolitics, science and everything, they are not even that good at stuff which is why this loathesome abomination exists and I seriously have to think of complaints that shield people I detest from serious consequences with partial info.
🖕

Fwiw i do think cancel culture is real -it just operates differently on the left and right.

The right has these mafia boss, more money and power concentration or churches. The left has more righteous mobs, more valid morals which makes the self righteousness way more damaging. Personality is important.
I am angered beyond forgiveness and sick of these two types of jerks. One kind (yhe right) I never pay attention to except when I play the “hostage” game when i ponder which noxious rwer I would pick -TikTok ban/religious whack job meninist populism or unhappy childhood/meninist nihilist corporatism. It is a draw so far. At a human level I think the unhappy childhood is more sympathetic and both are awful politically. Troy Farah or Matt Stoller? That’s a tough one. They are both cool different ways.
I hate society.
But especially on war/immigration politics, I do think the type of left which largely ignores global warming, factory farming shows often how it is a valid to hate enemy group that this warlike type lusts for. And they don’t get that that keeps changing.
13 years ago when faux female empowerment was at its peak, this same catty mob mase feminism about warlike social policing.
I didn’t like to call myself a feminist those days.
Tim Hunt. It wasn’t about Hunt but the dynamics of acceptable bullying and these two childish factions warring.

Now that crowd is silent as their ways among other factors helped this brainless meninist bro army rise and I call myself a feminist.

Just bullying as animals always experienced.
And endless permacrises.
It won’t help people in wad zones. Though destroying the power of these vile defence contractors and media companies feeding it could.